Momnesia

What Age is Too Early for THE TALK About the Birds and the Bees?

Augusta, GA. -

We're having a slow morning, and Emmie is watching cartoons while eating her breakfast.

"Mom?" Emmie says.
"Yeah, Doodle?"
"Where do babies come from?"

What - seriously? She's four! Don't I get a little bit longer before I have to try to explain this without giggling like a schoolgirl?

"Um, why do you ask?"
"Mom," she reproaches me. "Where do dey come from?"

"They come from their mommies and daddies," I said. "They grow in their mommies' tummy."

She considers this for a moment.

"But, mom, Flapjack say dey come from seaweed."

I laugh heartily at this. I had expected a more serious conversation, not something related to a cartoon.

"Well, sweetie, Flapjack also has talking whales. So I'm not sure you should be taking biology lessons from a cartoon," I giggle.

"No, no!" she says. "Dey say dat some babies come from seaweed."

"Well... maybe seaweed babies come from seaweed mommies..." I acquiesce.

"No, no! Human babies!"

"I don't think that is correct, sweetie."

She frowns a little, and goes back to watching the cartoon. I sense the conversation is over, so I go on about my breakfast-making business. But I hear her mutter to herself.

"Wull, das wut Flapjack say..."