Friday, March 30, 2007
Stupid Headline of the Day
Be careful overseas, State Department warnsOne imagines that "new" makes up the majority of the word "news" for a freaking reaso...
The Ties That Bind and Choke the Living Hell Out of You So That No One Can Hear You Screaming
My aunt Cathy e-mailed me for the first time in years. I haven't seen her since I was 15 years old. That side of the family... meh... not so fun. Anyway, Cathy is my mother's sister, and I have tried to respect that. But she's been snidely insulting...
Monday, March 26, 2007
My job is awesome
A.C. is a fantastic copy editor, always worried about the little things that could hurt our credibility."Isn't motherfucker one word?" she asks...."Are you blogging that!?" she asks."Yeah...""Isn't it sad when I know your blogging face?"I love my j...
Nerd+Nerd=Dork
Here’s what Katie Hansen said about Scott. He probably knows her as Katie Brooks. Heh, just read the yard sale blog. Very funny! Your friend is a good writer. I actually know her husband Scott. We went to highschool together and we were drama geeks...
Amsterdammit!
"Jason and I saw that movie in Amsterdam," A.W. says."Love it!" says A.C."We also saw 'Elizabeth' with Cate Blanchett," she says."Weren't there any Amsterdam-y movies playing?" I ask."I don't know. I don't remember," she muses. "But you know you can...
The Winner, and Still Champion!
Scott received word today that he won an AP Award for his coverage of James Brown's death. That's my husband, everyone! Witness his greatnes...
Wha...?
"So I got caught by a train this morning, and on the back of every car was a sign stamped that said, 'Do not hump,'" Amy says.I stare at her in disbelief. "Nuh-uhhhh!""Yes!""Do not hump what?!""I don't know!"UPDATE: Thanks, Ji...
Sunday, March 25, 2007
Influential
Emerson is in a foul mood because "Branny" and "Dada" left. Well, sorry, but your grandparents live in Atlanta, and they need to get back. Besides, you've had enough sugar. So, anyway, they're gone and she's pissed. And hungry.
"Emmie eat?" she asks...
She's Going the Distance...
What happens when you hold a yard sale to raise money for cancer and no one comes?6:30 a.m. - Amy and Nola arrive at my house with a truckload of stuff. I am still frantically hopping around shirtless with one leg in my jeans, hair wet, as they arrive,...
Friday, March 23, 2007
Stupid Headline of the Day
Wolfgang Puck puts mercy on menu across USAIf only we could serve some to the detainees at Gitm...
Thursday, March 22, 2007
Stupid Headline of the Day
"Wolfgang Puck’s new kindler, gentler menu."At least the story satisfied my burning curiosit...
I'm just asking...
You don't have to be a media critic to know that FOX News utilizes every propaganda trick imaginable. Agenda Setting is a fully-owned subsidiary of FOX News, Inc. In other words, they frame their issues, choose their guests and pose their questions...
Wednesday, March 21, 2007
Stupid Headline of the Day
"Online anonymity lets users gets nasty" (scroll to bottom) -- and it lets their copy editors gets stupi...
My dad is funny
My parents (Emerson calls them "Branny" and "Dadada") are coming down this weekend to see Emerson, and will take her to the park. I made some suggestions, and my dad e-mailed me about it.Branny just told me she is bringing Easter eggs for Em to hunt...
Tuesday, March 20, 2007
Welcome to the New & Improved Metro Spirit!
C.P. cracks me up. I am recreating his post on the Metro Spirit blog here. Because I can. And it's better than anything I could have come up with. Plus he has a sweet new haircut.The new Spirit - now with more water!Lots of water.Design desks after...
Stupid Headline of the Day
CLASSIC CASE OF 'ROID RAGE"Pro wrestlers linked to steroid use" That's kind of like saying: Pro actors linked to Meridia use. Not exactly shocking new...
Monday, March 19, 2007
Perfect Parents? No Such Thing!
Guest Post: Scott Hudson
There is no such thing as the “perfect parent.” Parenting is every bit as much a learning experience as is childhood. Yet, some people never get it. My wife and I waited until our mid-thirties to have a young ‘un (hey! Speak...
I Need a Spanking
I've had too much caffeine and Prozac today. I've become kind of a whirling dervish of gaiety and snarkiness. I'm gayly snarky. I'm really happy about being a smart-ass to all who cross my path. I am sure I am irritating everyone around me with my incessant...
Oh, snap!
Scott usually calls me a number of times throughout the day. But he didn't this morning. About noon I looked at A.C. and mentioned that. She furrowed her brow and said, "That is kind of strange." By 1 p.m., I was losing my mind and broke down and called...
Sunday, March 18, 2007
Induction Suction
Hagar: Dude! What up?! Congrats!Stipe: Don't touch me.Hagar: Bro! You're one of us now!Stipe: I will never be one of you. Never!H: Hey, have a beer!St: I don't drink alcohol.H: ... uh .... toke?S: Oh, okay, sure! Thanks!H: Bro! See? It's all about the...
Saturday, March 17, 2007
That's Augusta...
"Goddamn," I hear T.G. mutter."Why are we cursing? Can I curse, too?" I ask."Yeah," he says."We just realized that the name of this soup kitchen that serves mostly African-Americans is called Masters Table," C.P. says."Noooo. That's not... that's not...
Thursday, March 15, 2007
Even Dogs Get Sick
SCOTT WITH SCRABBLE AT THREE MONTHSOur firstborn, Scrabble, started acting funny the other day. He was not his usual self, moped around, and cried if you touched his belly. Of course, our reaction was: do we take him to the emergency clinic and spend...
Wednesday, March 14, 2007
Poop on Parade
So we moved to 1) escape the idiots threatening us because of my husband's job, and 2) have a bigger place. But in the process, we acquired a piano. We finally got more living space and then the Hulking Piano of Untuned Doom sucked it away!
Then Scott...
Bah-dum-bum!
UGA'S REDCOAT MARCHING BANDWe're discussing the incident reports from local schools. They are so horribly disturbing: rape, molestation, guns, knives, posession of 21 bags of marijuana (!!)... Emerson is going into a convent. Now. A.W. makes a "these...
Tuesday, March 13, 2007
Snake Charmer
At a festival meeting...Me: "...and ants and snakes were a problem last year."S.P.: "Really?"A.C: "One."Me: "Still, we're 90% sure that it was poisonous."B.D: "Where are those religious people when you need them? They show up at First Friday. I bet...
Blogging for Love
A local newspaper ran a cover story lately on finding love in online dating sites. The ads on the sites reflect a basic impulse in life. If you have not found love, then you are probably looking for it. And why not look online? Perceptions about this...
Thursday, March 08, 2007
Egocentrism
"I was a philosophy major in college for a while," J.R. said."Me, too! I thought I could change the world just by thinking about it," I said."Not me. I was just really full of myself...
Ethics in Government
I know that people are convinced that media employees have no ethics, but it's just not true. If you knew all the stuff that we would like to run with and can't, you'd storm government buildings and throw the bastards out. It would be like Custers Last...
She Did It Again!!!!
My morning ritual:1. Wake up, scratch my head and then my ass and sleepily get ready to take Emmy to daycare.2. The coffee begins kicking in when I am on Boy Scout Road; however, I am still sleepy and dreaming of one thing: a nice, warm bath.3. Arrive...
Wednesday, March 07, 2007
Kristy Swanson Hasn't Aged Well
Does anyone remember the "Flowers in the Attic" books? Yeah. Then you know how scared I am right no...
Tuesday, March 06, 2007
More Bureaucracy
So we moved, and we have a new unlisted number. All caught up now? Good.Anyway, the telephone service in the old place went out on March 1, which was the same day we were supposed to have service in our new place. Five days and four telephone calls...
Cornholio
I just have to congratulate my husband for finding a brand of toilet paper that is actually made with cardboard. I never realized how important it is to exfoliate the nether regions - which are my favorite regions, by the way.Or they were. Now they...
Monday, March 05, 2007
Those Freaky Germans
Our cleaning woman didn't come this weekend and the trash cans are overflowing."Hey, E.B., can your cane do double duty as a trash compactor," J.W. asks."NO," E.B. replies. "Perhaps you didn't see me with the Lysol last week. Besides that, I'm completely...
Beaurocracy
In the criminal justice system, the people are represented by two separate yet equally important groups—the police who investigate crimes, and the district attorneys who prosecute the offenders. This is my story.AUGUSTA, GA -- So the police called and...
Cleanliness is Next to Chanel No. 5
Overheard at the copy machine:A.C.: You smell good today.A.W.: Thanks. I took a showe...
Campaign for Change
Ann Coulter, long known for her sugary sweet delivery and too-nice approach to politics, has joined in the gay rights movement. Coulter came out in favor of gay marriage when supporting John Edwards' campaign for president. She also is appalled at the...
Augusta Has No Real Crime Problem
Before Corey sent me this, I was mad about my car window getting busted out. Not so much anymore.FEBRUARY 10: Hat Saroeun, 49, died instantly when a hand grenade exploded at 10pm in Anlong Svay village, Banteay Meanchey province. His wife, Lang Sim,...
Sunday, March 04, 2007
Moving Daze
It has been a tumultuous move with a 2-year-old. We work primarily around her nap times and when she is sleeping, otherwise there are a number of staircases for her to tumble down. It has been a learning experience, and I would like to share a few lessons...
Saturday, March 03, 2007
Black Tie Blunders
Scott drove all over town yesterday looking for a black tuxedo jacket to match his pants for the Morris Museum Gala that was held last night. He was also supposed to pick up a pair of black pantyhose for me.He comes in the door with a jacket in his...
Friday, March 02, 2007
Parenthood
This is the pre-editing photo of my husband and daughter that local photographer Tim Conway took for Metro Augusta Parent Magazine. Scott was featured in the inside back cover with his "Top Ten Things You Don't Know About Dads." The best: "The worst...
My Spies are Everywhere
Scott was 40 minutes away in the next state, and still I know what he is doing. Mwaaah-ha-ha-ha! That's him on the left, talking on - you guessed it! - his cell phon...
Favorite Spam of the Day
Avocado Skeleton Buzkashi. Apparently, Buzkashi is a game like polo. But played with a skeleton made of avocado. Sounds mess...
