Friday, August 31, 2007
Last of the Breed: Three legends, two men and a lot of $6 beers
This is a story written by my father.
AUGUSTA, GA. / ATLANTA, GA. - My son came to me with a dilemma: two tickets to the “Last of the Breed: Merle Haggard, Willie Nelson and Ray Price” show at Chastain Amphitheatre and a shift at work he couldn’t get...
Power play
Characters return to stage a desperate dance in Le Chat Noir’s season-opening play about relationships on the edgeRichard Justice and Ashley Poteet star in Le Chat Noir's "Torch Song Trilogy: Fugue in a nursery." AUGUSTA, GA. - It’s been...
Medium as message
Former potter rises to art world’s challenge of his medium by ‘taking the clay out’ of his work.The art world told Raoul Pacheco what he ought to do.AUGUSTA, GA. - When Raoul Pacheco went to graduate school, he had no idea he was entering occupied territory.“There’s...
Master Plan
Commission votes to fund year-long project to develop new plan for an expanded and improved downtown.AUGUSTA, GA. - Over the past 25 years, the downtown master plan led to the creation of green spaces like Riverwalk and the Augusta Common, says Augusta...
Musical praise
Contemporary Christian superstar Twila Paris has 19 albums under her belt.But, this time out, she found the way to move forward was to go back.AUGUSTA, GA. - After 19 albums, any artist can struggle to move forward. Twila Paris, the contemporary Christian...
All your rowdy friends are at Diamond Lakes Park
AUGUSTA, GA. - If modern-day race fans had a place to see Richard Petty and others of his ilk burning up the asphalt practically in their own neighborhoods, you better believe they’d be there, cold beverage cans in hand. As it turns out, Augustans had...
You have to be kinder to your circulatory system
"What's Augusta Magazine's circulation?" my boss asks."Uh.... I dunno. I'll find out."Moments later..."Augusta Magazine’s circulation is 10,000, with a readership of 86,000," I read off the corporate website.""Ten THOUSAND?!" he asks,...
City walls
AUGUSTA, GA. - Climb to the top of a hill in Tuscany and look down upon a vast quilt-like pastoral landscape of vineyards, farmland and the remnants of ancient civilizations.“It’s just so quiet and so nice. I could see myself painting over there, almost...
Show and tell
AUGUSTA, GA. - When Laurie McRae asks which members of the audience at her antiques seminars have seen a Chippendale chair in person, most of the attendees raise their hands. Not so fast.As it turns out, Thomas Chippendale was more than an excellent...
Wednesday, August 29, 2007
Theft of Intellectual Property
AUGUSTA, GA. - Scott is reiterating his speech about the Ellis Street Option that he gave to a packed community center on Tuesday night."Some people have called it pie-in-the-sky. That's fine, because in 1845, Henry Cumming had his detractors, but he...
99 cents of love out of a dollar
AUGUSTA, GA. - My husband would buy lunch meat from, like, the 99-Cent Store. He doesn't worry about the brand, the expiration date or even the concept of a food product before he buys it. He considers only two things:1. What food section am I in?2....
Spam stupidity
AUGUSTA, GA. - "Maybe if everyone passes this on, someone will see this child. The internet circulates even overseas, South America, and Canada, etc. Please pass this to everyone in your address book. With GOD on his side he will be ...
Monday, August 27, 2007
A Tribute
Mini Kiss, a tribute band, in miniature."There's going to be a Red Hot Chili Peppers tribute band at The Country Club," A.W. says."Good lord," I moan."I wonder if that would suck," she muses."Don't they have to, like, not be a band anymore before you...
Showin' My Ass (Sorry, Mom)
I'm wearing a new dress that's made of very light material. I'm not quite used to it."Hey, Alice, I'm worried that when I get up today this dress is going to ride up, so sorry if I flash you," I say.She shrugs: "Nothin' I haven't seen before...
Sunday, August 26, 2007
Monday, August 20, 2007
Misogyny
About a boy who thinks women being mean to men is worse than misogyny:Me: "I bet if he had a girlfriend he would never say that in front of her."A.W.: "He might be able to get one if he hung out with someone besides those two 'Night at the Roxbury'...
I knew that
A.W.: "This place where Twila Paris is playing...?"Me: "The Sanctuary?"A.W.: "Oh, okay."Me: "It's a church."A.W.: "Well, I didn't think it was a juke joint."Me: "No, it's a strip club...
Working in a Room of One's Own
A.W. is asking me about a paragraph."I always tend to write long sentences," she said."Yeah, well, we're not going to the lighthouse Mrs. Dalloway," I snar...
Fresh 'n' Fruity
We're potty training Emerson... you know, when she lets us.
I sit her on the potty, and talk to her while she tries to go. She's really getting into it. A lot. Friday I sat her down and she looked up at me with wide-eyed and determined expression and...
Thursday, August 16, 2007
Torturing My Fellow Media Peeps
An e-mail exchange:Me: Need to talk to Liz Hill and Brigett Williams. They’re both finalists for Metro’s Best Local TV Reporter. Also need high res photos. Can you help?!Ed: Stacey, No problem. PLEASE reference us as NBC Augusta (and/or) NBC Augusta...
Wednesday, August 15, 2007
ENOUGH!
A co-worker's child was left at the wrong bus stop last year.
Yesterday, a 5-year-old was put on a bus home and refused to get off the bus. The bus driver forced her off the bus. When she found her front door locked, she began walking down Berckman's...
Tuesday, August 14, 2007
It's All About Me
I'm working my way through the parking lot at Augusta Exchange, trying to get to Bruester's. I promised Emmie we could have some (sugar free low fat) ice cream after dinner. Emmie was in the back seat, whining.
"I wah eye keeeeeem," she said.
"I know,...
Monday, August 13, 2007
2 going on 20
Emerson and I were engaged in a massive, three-hour play session that had somehow devolved into just running from room-to-room and shrieking. Don't ask me to explain it, but it was fun at the time. Finally I caught her and tickled her until she couldn't...
Sunday, August 12, 2007
For Sale - $20 Each
So I posted these two items to craigslist, just wanting to get rid of them to make space in the house. The next morning, I had two e-mails from interested buyers, and one came to the house while I was at work.The phone rang at my desk."This is Stacey....
Saturday, August 11, 2007
Friday, August 10, 2007
Band Name
AW: There's a band called The Cutlines.Me: That's what we need. Unemployed copy editors with guitars.They'd know that I was supposed to use a colon instead of a period after "need...
Wednesday, August 08, 2007
Go Ask Alice
We're talking about... oh, hell, I don't know what we were talking about yesterday. But Amy weighed in.A.C.: "You can stomp him with your huge shoes."Me: "Hey!"A.C.: "I'm sorry! But A.W. isn't here. Someone has to make fun of you."Me: "Oh, yeah, that's...
Urgh...
I don't mean to complain - really! - because usually I love my job. But our ad reps, it seems, are doing TOO good a job. Every time I've called someone today about a story, they've practically shrieked, "WE DON'T HAVE ANY MONEY!"Case in point, the Aiken...
Monkey Mail
BOB: Thought you'd get a kick out of this since you always asked Natalie for a monkey... Man smuggles monkey into NYC airport! NEW YORK - A man smuggled a monkey onto an airplane Tuesday, stashing the furry fist-size primate under his hat until passengers...
Tuesday, August 07, 2007
How Can You Follow Idiots?
Regardless of our ideological differences, how can members of the Taliban follow such obvious morons?Taliban Launch Frontal Attack on Base GHAZNI, Afghanistan (AP) - A group of 75 Taliban militants tried to overrun a U.S.-led coalition base in southern...
Monday, August 06, 2007
Grandparents! Gah!
So I went to pick up Emerson from the grandparents' house last night at 10 p.m. and there she was, in a t-shirt and diaper, sitting at a newly purchased Little Mermaid table-and-chairs set, watching Harry Potter on their huge television, eating homemade...
Friday, August 03, 2007
Breakfast Schmekfast
Upon the advice of Chris, I actually went to Starbucks yesterday morning, and I don't even know what happened. It was like time and higher reasoning both ceased.After trying to order the Turkey Bacon Bagel ("May I have the turkey bacon bagel?" "WHAT...
Thursday, August 02, 2007
Happy Birthday
Scott went to the fights last night so Emerson and I went out for girls' night.
"I go downtown!" she shrieked when we got in the car at day care.
"That's right, we're going downtown," I cooed.
"I go downtown!" she shrieked again, and about every 30...
Wednesday, August 01, 2007
An Unidentified Source Reveals...
A story about my wonderful husband:"I was in high school and he did like a casting call thing. He did a performance at Regency Mall with a dance group and it was in conjunction with the Dysart studio people. So half of the people did a number from 'Vogue,'...
Dictionary of Motherhood
Published in Augusta Parent today:The first time I forgot my husband’s name was funny. The second time was annoying. After the third time, he became “honey” or “sweetheart.” That’s because I can never remember his name, even though he’s a semi-famous...
A Request
Is it too much to ask for a healthy, portable breakfast that can be obtained quickly in this town? Here's my suggestion: Instead of a fried chicken breast on a buttered biscuit, serve a grilled chicken breast on a whole grain bagel. Instead of a side...
