Friday, July 30, 2010
Don't Worry; Be Frugal
When I started this new job, I knew there would be nearly two months between my last paycheck at my old job, and my first paycheck at my new. Yikes. How to get through that without dipping into savings?
The answer was really pretty simple: Stop spending...
I Thought She'd Been Watching 'Miami Vice'
We're in the car, coming back from the park. Emerson and Zequan are in the back seat, playing action figures, and pretending to be "bampires."
"Hey, man, do you know where I can buy some coke?" Emmie asks, through plastic fangs.
"No, dude."
My head...
Thursday, July 29, 2010
Parenting Tactics Sometimes Backfire
Emmie and Zequan are playing catch in the house. They are not yet old enough to have caught that Brady Bunch episode, so I have to bring on the Stern Face.
"That throw came very close to hitting this lamp or knocking over my lemonade. What's a better...
Wednesday, July 28, 2010
Myrtle is a Weird Name for a Beach
As it turns out, my husband's vacation does not roll over each year. Silly, foolish mortal. So he has two weeks of vacation to take this year. I'm trying to figure out where the three of us could have some fun together.
We visited Myrtle Beach once,...
Tuesday, July 27, 2010
Reflections of Summer
Yeah, it looks dorky. But I use one of those thermal reflective thingies that go in your car windshield.
"Mama? Why you got a sillber fing in you window?" Emmie asked me.
"It keeps the car from getting too hot," I replied.
"How?"
"It pushes the...
Monday, July 26, 2010
Flat Earth Theory
I don't spend a lot of time actively promoting my blog. It's linked automatically to my social network, so that's something I have to think about, oh... never. I make a few bucks a month from the ads stuck on the sides, and I cash it in at Christmas...
Saturday, July 24, 2010
Note to You, Mom
At Brookfield Park, watched a woman smack her 18-month-old on the behind five times, hard enough to almost knock him down. He had repeatedly asked her for grapes. When she told him that there weren't any, he stomped his little foot once and frowned....
Friday, July 23, 2010
They Could at Least Stash a Prize Inside
How many of you are aware that there is a Journal of Electronic Packaging? No? No one? Me, neither. But I suggest that we all familiarize ourselves with it long enough to drop a letter to the editor. Because it's not enough that I have to use a hacksaw...
Thursday, July 22, 2010
No, Scott Hasn't Been Slapping My Face
I'm rather vocal when I like a product. I'm especially vocal when I like a product and it's CHEAP. So I'm going to start doing more product reviews, in order to be helpful to people. And because sometimes I have nothing to talk about. Hello, space filler.
One...
Wednesday, July 21, 2010
Who Says No Prayer in School?
Emmie watched her first episodes of Ren & Stimpy this week (thanks, Netflix Instant for the Wii). I had forgotten how disgusting it was. Sugar-coated milk?! [gag]
But it has some important lessons for kids, too, about friendship, jealousy, cleanliness,...
For Your Eyes Only
I'm rather vocal when I like a product. I'm especially vocal when I like a product and it's CHEAP. So I'm going to start doing more product reviews, in order to be helpful to people.
Here's a product that works, and is also cheap. What, you say?...
Right way, wrong number
My personal cell phone rings.
"Stacey Hudson, how may I help you?"
"Oh... uh... I think I have the wrong number," a woman stammers.
"Are you trying to reach [name]?"
"No."
"Well, now I just feel bad about myself."
"Oh, I'm so sorry," she says,...
Tuesday, July 20, 2010
Sleep Talking
Scott has a history of talking all kinds of bullcorn in his sleep. Like here. And here. It just never stops.
"Scott. Roll over, please."
"Mmm..."
"... Scott. Honey, roll over. I'm falling off the bed."
"Mmmm..."
"Scott."
"Mm."
"Scott."
"Mm."
"Scott."
"Mm."
"Okay,...
Monday, July 19, 2010
Parenting: You're Doing it Wrong, Part IV
This the last part of a four-part rant. Read the previous post here.
Well, I have one thing to say to the mom who crossed the street to avoid me at First Friday this month:Suck it.
Oh, yeah, you heard me. You and your superior attitude can suck it....
Sunday, July 18, 2010
Parenting: You're Doing it Wrong, Part III
This is part three of a four-part rant. Read the previous post here.
And then there are the small things that no one articulates; the things that one parent chooses that make another parent uncomfortable. That personal discomfort – despite the fact...
Saturday, July 17, 2010
Parenting: You're Doing it Wrong, Part II
This is part two of a four-part series. Read the previous post here.
But so many women are so impassioned about their own agendas that they fail to realize that other women are equally impassioned about their agendas for equally relevant reasons. And...
Friday, July 16, 2010
Parenting: You're Doing it Wrong, Part I
Parenting is complex matter deeply filtered through our own psyches, experiences, dreams and situations. And, as such, not a lot of people can really express their parenting ideology, or style. Authoritarian? Permissive? Democratic? Indulgent? Neglectful?...
Wednesday, July 14, 2010
But They Had Candy
It seems that Emmie got attached to my old iPod with the cracked screen...
"See, Emmie? All new!" I exclaimed.
"Dey fix it?"
"No, this is a new one."
"What?!" she yelled, and she frowned at me. "You gib dat iPod away to strangers?!"
Get the Shout...
Saturday, July 10, 2010
Don't Talk About My Colon While I'm in a Comma
At some point, every one of us should have a colonoscopy. And for the same reason that people tell proctology jokes, they laugh about colonoscopies, too.
I called home to check on my (relative who does not want to be named) who had enjoyed a colonoscopy...
Thursday, July 08, 2010
The Best Husband Ever
Scott ran to the store to pick up a few things... including certain products of the decidedly feminine kind."I guess you're out running errands for your wife," the clerk said.Scott grinned: "Well, I can assure you these are not for me."Sent via BlackBerry...
A Penny for Your Candy
Summer at the McGowen house meant our annual round of swimming lessons. We drove what seemed like an eternity from our house to a country property in the next county where Mrs. Webb gave Red Cross-certified lessons in her over-large above-ground swimming...
Wednesday, July 07, 2010
Fall for a Shooting Star
Emmie gasps: "Mama! I see a shining star! I'm gonna to make a wish!"
"Great!"
"I wish I had a shiny airplane dat cost no money and dollars."
"Good wish, Doodle."
"Now you make one, mama."
"Ummmm.... I wish I won the lottery."
"What's a lottery?"
"It's...
Tuesday, July 06, 2010
Little Pink Houses
We're riding back from swimming at the club pool. Emmie's usually so animated after these outings, joking from the back seat and sometimes whacking me in the head with her inflatable noodle and then cackling hysterically until I threaten to give the...
Saturday, July 03, 2010
Hooked on Phonics Worked... Not So Much
Emmie's playing a game that, on one of the stations, asks her to build words on a book by matching foam letters with a drawing. The word she spells is "cape."
"What does that say, Emmie?"
"It says SUPERHERO!"
LOL!
Seriously, though, this game is...
