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Monday, October 20, 2014

The 25 Thoughts You Have While Checking Your LinkedIn Connection Requests

Monday, October 20, 2014 By

1. Ooh, new connection requests! Yay!

2. Wait, I thought I'd already contacted everyone on my contacts list about connecting on LinkedIn.

3. Eh, I have a lot of contacts. Maybe I missed some.

4. Who's this?

5. Who's that?

6. I don't know half these people who have requested that I connect with them. No disrespect, but this is LinkedIn, not Twitter. It's for professional networking, so we should probably be in each others' general circles.

7. Who is this? Do I report this person for trying to connect with me when we don't know each other?

8. No. That's a douche move. Maybe I'll meet this person later. I'm sure I will find him/her to be lovely.

9. This person is a director of sales, so we might have a lot in common.

10. Oh. For a car dealership. That means you're going to try to sell me a car. I have a car. Rejected. Sorry.

11. And here's one from an insurance agent I've never met. You're going to try to sell me insurance. Rejected. No offense.

12. And here's someone else I don't know whose entire LinkedIn profile consists of 6 months running a home-based multi-level marketing business. Rejected aaaaaaaand.... reported.

13. Doesn't anyone I know want to connect?

14. Here's another one I don't know.

15. And another one.

16. Ugh! Reject, reject, reject, reject - wait...

17. Oh! I know her! I worked with her, like, 15 years ago!

18. No, wait, she was horrid to me. Nevermind.

19. Psh! I can't believe she'd try to connect with me. The nerve...

20. Oh, she lost her job and is looking for a new one... (sigh) Okay, fine. But I still don't like you. Accepted.

21. Hey! This person works where I work!

22. But so do 12,999 other people. And I don't know 12,990 of them.

23. Do I accept her request?

24. Eh, why not. Accepted.

25. Sooooo.... one. One nebulously connected person out of the 20 connection requests.


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