Wednesday, December 31, 2014
Happy Awkward New Year!
AUGUSTA, GA. - So, I'm going to a New Year's Eve party. My sweet friend invited me. I probably could have taken the initiative to make plans with a little more specificity, but that would require me to be, like, social, and stuff.
Hi. I'm awkward.
There...
Monday, December 22, 2014
I fail at Christmas, but my mom wins at life
AUGUSTA, GA. - So, with Emerson being sick for two weeks straight, plus commencement and a host of other events, as well, I'm really behind on my shopping. I call my mother for some guidance.
"Mom, are dad's clubs hybrids, or does he have wood?"...
Friday, December 19, 2014
Dear Wal-Mart - oh, nevermind.
AUGUSTA, GA. - So, I'm sure it comes as no surprise to anyone on planet Earth that I had a less-than-stellar experience at Wal-Mart. But I'm not writing about it because I'm angry. It wasn't a big deal. I'm writing because it looks like a customer...
Thursday, December 11, 2014
A Conversation with IT Services
AUGUSTA, GA. - I had been experiencing computer issues for a week. I was at my wits' end. Not only was my tower down in IT being repaired because the wackadoodle broke and rendered the doohickey TOTALLY useless (those wackadoodles... geez), but...
Monday, December 08, 2014
He's bathed in the spirit
AUGUSTA, GA. - I sent out an email to all members of my organization about our holiday service project for Ronald McDonald House Charities of Augusta. I got an email back from someone complaining that they don't celebrate Christmas, and couldn't participate.
That's...
Thursday, December 04, 2014
Wednesday, December 03, 2014
Attack of the Giant Metal Chickens
DISCLAIMER: No one show my mother this post!
AUGUSTA, GA. - My mother has a thing for chickens. She grew up with them while spending summers on her grandmother's farm, and has a fondness that has lead her to decorate her house with them.
It's...
Wednesday, November 26, 2014
Sorry to crush your dreams, but.... no
Emerson: Mom, can I take some of your makeup?
Me: Where?
Emerson: To Atlanta.
Me: Why?
Emerson: Because I don't even hardly have any makeup.
Me: That's because you're nine years old, Emerson. No, you can't take my makeup.
...
Monday, November 24, 2014
I am undermining my child's teachers... maybe
AUGUSTA, GA - Emerson's social studies teacher is probably exasperated by her at this point in the school year. Every time she comes home with a new event to share with me, it's like I just HAVE to tell her it's a big lie. I don't know what my freaking...
Thursday, November 20, 2014
His wardrobe consists almost entirely of T-shirts and smarty pants
AUGUSTA, GA. -
Me: "Okay, I gotta run. I have a meeting in ten minutes."
R.H.: "Okay, then."
Me: "Ten minutes? No, 14 minutes. But I still gotta run."
R.H.: "Just not quite as fast."
Me: "... Dork. Bye."
R.H.: [too busy laughing to respond...
Monday, November 17, 2014
One boyfriend for sale
AUGUSTA, GA. - R.H. was coming over after work, so I cooked dinner. But I didn't have time to defrost and blah blah some fancyness, so I overcompensated for the lack of fancy by making a salad, Zatarain's jamabalaya, and a big pot of Greek lemon-chicken...
Thursday, November 13, 2014
I called looking for a doll and you'll never guess what happened next... actually, you probably will
AUGUSTA, GA - My daughter has a very intense best-friendship. I love her little friend almost like my own child, and I'm glad the two of them have such a beautiful relationship. They're very caring and polite to one another, have a lot of fun, and...
