Re-launched, but still slightly under construction. :-)

Wednesday, February 29, 2012

Do not call at 1 a.m. and chomp Doritos in my ear, druggie

Wednesday, February 29, 2012 By

It's after midnight when my phone rings. Holy crap, someone's dead.

"Hello?" I croak, sleep and the remnants of bronchitis clouding my voice.

I hear chewing. Chewing! Whose parents did not teach them phone manners? THIS GUY.

" 'ey," he chomps.

"Hello," I spit, through gritted teeth.

"Uhh.... [crunch crunch] Who's this?"

(sigh) "Probably not the person you're looking for."

"Uh, well, [chomp, smack] I was calling about someone who has Oxy for sale. My back is really killing me."

"Definitely not the person you're looking for."



I miss the days when I could slam down a phone. Cordless and cell phones don't really drive the point home.


  1. You could click the "end" button really, really aggressively... but then only you would notice. I miss the old phones too. *sigh*