Momnesia

Next on 'Preventable Heart Attacks...'

I was pet-sitting for some friends, and took the opportunity to watch "True Blood" on their giant flat screen. Midway through a very tense scene, I heard someone pounding on the outside of their house.

"What the - !" I jumped up from the couch. The noise was right behind me. Not at the door, or the window. But pounding on the side of the house, near where I was sitting.

I grabbed my phone and started to dial 911... but no one was out there. Maybe kids playing a stupid prank?

As I was about to leave the window and run outside - because I'm so smart - they did it again, in the same place, almost right beside my head! My heart almost stopped. I crept forward, kneeling on the couch, peering out the window into the darkness. There was no one there.

And then I saw the small speaker mounted to the wall...

... and realized the banging was the sound of a TV vampire knocking on a TV door.

Did I mention how smart I am?