Momnesia

Ugh. Me Like Inches. And Hoo-has...

"How did I know that was you calling me?" I asked my friend, A.C.

"I would have called you immediately, but I was having my hoo-ha examined," she answered.

"Nice. Good morning, Stacey. Let's talk about my hoo-ha," I laughed. "So how is it this morning?"

"About 75% effaced, and a fingertip dilated," she moaned.

"What, that's like... 3 centimeters?"

"No! It's not even 1 centimeter!"

"Yuhuh!" I turn to my co-worker, A.C.2, and hold up my finger. "Isn't that more than a centimeter?"

"I don't know how much a centimeter is," she answered.

"What - didn't you go to elementary school?"

"Do you know how long it's been since I went to elementary school? We didn't have the metric system back then," A.C.2 scoffs.

A.C. guffaws on the phone: "Did she just say they didn't have the metric system?"

"Yeah, back when they were carving the system out in rocks, A.C.2 was graduating Georgia Southern with the other cave people," I laughed.