Momnesia

Delusions

I am 7 months pregnant, and I am becoming more dependent upon Scott. It’s not entirely fair to him, but there are things I’m slowly less able to do for myself, like, bend over. It’s becoming humorously difficult. And since I work all day, he cooks dinner every night. If he didn’t, I would just eat whatever fell into my mouth, and it would probably not be very healthy.

So we’re outside yesterday, or the day before, and Michael, our next door neighbor calls out: “How’re you doing?”
“Oh, I’m feeling very pregnant today, but fine. How about you?”
There is a pause.
“I didn’t know you were pregnant!”
I look down at my belly. It seems pretty obvious to me...
“Um, yeah, ‘bout 7 months.”
“Wow! Congratulations!”
“Thanks.”
“What are you having?”
“A little girl.”
“aww...” he coos.

Later, as Scott and I are corralling the dogs to take them back inside, I mention this to Scott.
“How can he not tell that I’m pregnant?”
“You’re only showing a little bit.”
I stare at him, look down at my belly, and back at him.
“Are you nuts?”
“No.”
“Honey, I’m huge.”
“No, you’re not. And, you told me not to talk about it like that.”
“Okay, smoothing over the situation is one thing. But ignoring it entirely is just crazy.”
He laughs, and pats my belly.
“Okay, you’re definitely pregnant.”
“Okay, then.”
“But you’re not huge.”
“Thanks.”