Re-launched, but still slightly under construction. :-)

Sunday, August 03, 2003

This lady is the reason postal employees shoot up their offices.

I know most of my posts are bitchy, and I'm really not a bitchy person. I just work in an economically depressed area in which everyone segregates themselves by income level. Although I make decent money for the area, I work in a casual steakhouse that serves giant mugs of Long Island Ice Teas into which they also mix freaking grain alcohol and a flavored liquor. People come here to get wasted. It is frequently a very unpleasant mix of people who act with very little class in the first place, and who see me as lower class than them because of my employment. Oh, gods of the degree confirmation, I await your reply.

Lady: I'd like the hot wings. Now, are those hot?
Me (looking up from notepad to see if she's serious. She is): They're about medium, I'd say.
Lady: How hot is that?
Me (midway between hot and not-hot?): I suppose hot enough to taste, but not hot enough to burn.
Lady (looking pleased): Okay, but I want them double fried.
Me: Sure, I -
Lady (interrupting): Now, I don't want them fried twice as long. I want you to fry them, take them out of the grease, sauce 'em up, fry them again, and sauce 'em again.

I have no intention of telling the kitchen this. It will ruin the oil and render that fryer useless for the rest of the evening.

Me: Sounds great. No problem.

Later that meal...

Me: And how do we find our meals?
Lady: These wings is greasy.

Must... control... fist of death... She wanted her wings fried a really long time. Did she think they would come out all low-fat?

Me: Oh?
Lady (holding one up and actually squeezing it): See? It's just dripping!
Me (seeing as how I don't really give a crap): Would you like for me to have the kitchen make you another batch?
Lady: I don't know. These is making me sick.

ARE! ARE! As in: Your lack of education ARE making me sick!

Me: Shall I get you something else? Here, feel free to choose something else off the menu.
Lady (hardly even glancing at the menu): Just give me some fried cheese sticks.
Me (looking up from notepad to see if she's serious. She is): So, because they're too greasy, you'd like to replace fried hot wings with fried cheese sticks?
Lady (oblivious): Yes, thems sound good.
Me: My pleasure. That will be just a few minutes.

Ya'll, seriously, it isn't even the stupidity of this woman that irritates me. It's that good grammar costs nothing.


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