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Friday, May 23, 2014

News flash: Dating is a challenge

Friday, May 23, 2014 By

Friends of mine and I all agree that life at this point in our lives is very different than we expected. There are much fewer cocktail parties and amusing anecdotes about jet lag, and a great deal more numerous Redbox rentals.

This is not a bad thing, because the combination of jammies, wine, and a comfy sofa is a beautiful thing.

But sometimes it seems as though men in their forties aren't much different than the men we dated in college. There is still a lot of beer to be purchased - although much of it is now "craft" beer. There is meat in large portions - although it's more likely to be prosciutto or pork belly than bacon and burgers. And there are video games - although, at least, their xBoxes and Playstations can double as DVD and Blue Ray players. Personally, I like video games. So there.

But one thing has perplexed me. One would imagine that men in their forties would be more informed. Having likely enjoyed long-term sexual relationships, and even having produced children, the female anatomy should not be such a mystery anymore. But that's not necessarily true.

Recently, an intelligent man in his forties recoiled at the mere mention of a menstrual cycle. "Gross!" he replied, when the subject arose. "I don't want to hear about that!"

Did you just call women's bodies "gross?" Unacceptable!

We're not made out of toxic materials. While menstruation isn't the most convenient part of our lives, it's really not a huge deal. Twelve times a year, for between 30 and 40 years, give or take, we require a little extra maintenance. 

This guy, though, just couldn't conceive of women being "clean" or "sanitary" during their "time of the month," as he so humorlessly put it. He didn't understand the process or the purpose of women's menstruation, which tells me that he doesn't understand women's bodies.

Low-end estimates are that a woman will menstruate for at least 1,800 days in her life. That's almost five years. High-end estimates bring that number up to 3,400 days of her life. That's almost 10 years. Don't you want to know what your spouse is doing for five to 10 years of her life? Something in this guy's perception of women just doesn't jib with reality.

Ladies, if a 40-something-year-old man does not understand what your vagina is doing for 5-7 days every month, frankly, I wouldn't allow him to come near it the remaining days.


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