Momnesia

Emerson talked to my mom last night. Mom: So, what did you do today? Emerson: "Wull, I won four awards at school, because I am like a PRO at that, and then we went to tha store, then we went to tha ribber, and I climbed aaaaaalll ober da waterfalls...

Alice: "You doing anything tomorrow night?" Me: "I might manually declaw my cat. Why?" Alice: "Want to come to my book club?" Me: "Sure. What book should I pretend to have read?" Alice: "'Run,' by Ann Patchett." Me: "Cool. I need to do...

So, last night, I went to wake Emerson as part of the new no-bed-wetting ritual. It was 2 a.m., and she was like a furious bunny, hopping around in anger. That was fun. Between her and the now-excited cat, I was wide awake. So I started to go downstairs......

From: Stupid American  To: British Beauty Re: England is pissing me off I do not understand how your counties and stuff are put together. What is an "ex," and why are there esses and wesses of them? And what's the difference between a shire and...