Thursday, May 26, 2005
Cheese and Crackers
We’re sitting at the Vortex in L5P talking about random stuff, and somehow the story Douglas Adams (author of “The Hitchhiker’s Guide to the Galaxy) told at his lecture in Athens came up. I love this story.
So Douglas Adams (or, "Doug," as I like to...
Friday, May 20, 2005
Holy Terror
Emerson has been possessed by a screaming banshee. It’s hard to calm her down and she’s been skipping her naps. I spent the morning walking her and rocking her. She had plenty to eat, she was dry and not too hot or cold. At that point, baby books say...
Wednesday, May 18, 2005
Pacify This!
Emerson cannot go to sleep without her pacifier, but once she falls asleep, her mouth goes slack and the pacifier falls out. She immediately notices a distinct lack of rubbery goodness in her mouth and lets out a mighty scream.We go in, put the pacifier...
Sunday, May 15, 2005
Date Night! No Baby!
Me: We can go see a movie tomorrow?Scott: Yeah.Me: Do you want to see “The Ring 2?” It’s at the $1 theatre.Scott: But, we have the tickets.Me: But it won’t be at the theatre much longer.Scott: No, we’ll go see a movie at the big theatre.Me: Really?...
Saturday, May 14, 2005
Patron Verse of New Mothers
“...We shall not all sleep, but we shall all be changed.” I Corinthians 15:...
Thursday, May 12, 2005
Ouch
Scott’s mother is cooing at Emerson, who is grinning up at her from her stroller.Patsy: “Nona loves you! You are the most beautiful baby in the world!”Me: “She is.”Patsy: “Oh, did you know that? You’re the most beautiful baby in the world. They broke...
Wednesday, May 11, 2005
Without revealing too much
The complete and utter disregard by some people for ethical and moral guidelines never ceases to amaze me. A former coworker has been impersonating me online. To what end? I don’t know that I have enough darkness in my soul to even hazard a guess. It...
Monday, May 09, 2005
Swiffer Than You
I’m trying to get the house clean before my parents visit. It’s not easy because our dog sheds like mad, and it piles up under the bookcases.I sweep, but it’s not enough. I think I’m slick and I pull out the Swiffer that my mother bought us. I start...
Thursday, May 05, 2005
Mom Musings. Sorry! I'll Be Brief!
It’s been an amazing 3-month journey from our tiny, unresponsive-unless-she’s-crying little shitmonster to this incredibly interactive experiment in behavioral psychology.Now she’s trying to roll over. She’s discovered that she likes to sleep on her...
Monday, May 02, 2005
Dumbass
We’re out on the back deck, and I’ve been walking around in my underwear since Scott got home.Me: “So, you haven’t even asked me why I’m walking around without pants on.”Scott: “Why are you walking around with no pants on?”Me: “You know the chair that...
Sunday, May 01, 2005
Relief
I’m changing Emerson, and she has her feet up to her chest. I take them and put them in my mouth. She giggles and lets out a mighty fart. I press the soles of her feet to her cheeks and say in a silly voice: “Oh, noooooo!” And she opens her mouth...
