Momnesia

The governor of a state most famous for pig farming doesn't see if Beyoncé lyrics might be suitable for a preteen or a teen. Well, how about:

This goes out to all the women getting it in you're on your grind
To other men that respect what I do please accept my shine
Boy you know you love it how we're smart enough to make these millions
Strong enough to bear the children then get back to business ("Run the World [Girls]")

Or is that too much feminism for you, Huck? (He likes to be called Huck in private when he's pretending to paddle down the Mississippi with an escaped slave named Jim)

Okay, that's not even all of it, y'all. It wasn't enough that Huckabee thought it was okay to disrespect the parenting decisions of a couple in whose home he has probably spent less time than Beyoncé. Oh, no. He had to go and diss Queen Bey with this bit of nonsense:

“She has an exceptional set of pipes and can actually sing. She is a terrific dancer – without the explicit moves best left for the privacy of her bedroom. Jay-Z is a very shrewd businessman, but I wonder: does it occur to him that he is arguably crossing the line from husband to pimp by exploiting his wife as a sex object?"

She has an exceptional set of pipes - AND can actually sing? The double entendre is not subtle, and not lost on us. The former Governor of Arkansas might have argued that Beyoncé has a nice "set of pipes," which can be used to mean singing voice. But setting it off from her vocal ability to "actually sing"...? Y'all. He was talking about her boobs. 

The fact is that the former Pig-Farmer-in-Chief for the 32nd largest state in the 50-state union, a state second-best known for being the headquarters of the largest employer of welfare recipients in the nation, does not really have any issue with Jay Z sexualizing Beyoncé - because Huckabee just sexualized Beyoncé by complimenting her breasts.

What Huckabee has an issue with is Jay Z being successful at capitalizing on Beyoncé's sex appeal, and by Beyoncé being complicit in it. Or perhaps - and this is also quite likely - on Beyoncé bringing her own ideas to the table, working her own self as a product, using her sex appeal as just one of her tools to accomplish her goals (you know, with her great set of pipes, but also her singing ability), and then Jay Z benefiting as is natural in a marriage between two successful entertainers. But, no. Huckabee compared Beyoncé to a prostitute and Jay Z to a pimp. At least he called Jay-Z a "shrewd businessman." He couldn't even give Bey that much. This is the woman who famously fired her own father from his position as her manager, and started her own company, Parkwood Entertainment. The company was founded in 2008 and breaks records just about every time it breaks a record.

Is Huckabee really unaware of the hurtful, misogynistic, racist stereotypes he's promoting? Of the centuries of oppression he's tapping into? See, no. He's TOTALLY aware. He's aware. Really. He knows. There has always been racially-based duplicity "moral" standards in society - and especially in politics. He's playing on those warped standards with an elbow nudge to the ribs of his base, like, "Black people, amIRight, fellow white conservatives?"

So, for the record: Huckabee can sexualize Beyoncé. But Beyoncé - who is a grown-ass businesswoman living in a free society - can't sexualize herself. And she certainly can't make money doing it. Nor can her husband. And President Obama and the First Lady will never have the respect they are due. No matter what, there will always be a white conservative looking over their shoulders and saying, "No, you're doing it wrong."

Maybe Huckabee needs to listen to a little Beyoncé:

You can't fix what you can't see. It’s the soul that needs the surgery. ("Pretty Hurts")